Procreation-What a sacred power

     My husband and I just recently we were talking about how it is probably getting time to have "The" talk.  You know which one I mean with our daughter.  I was excited to have this subject this week to help me think of ways that I can approach the subject with her.  It is so important to teach them what a beautiful thing it is.  It isn't something dirty and gross but something that is so sacred and important if done within the bonds of marriage.  My neighbor's little girl was over here recently and she said to me, "I've had the talk, it's really gross."  She isn't a member of the church so I used this as an opportunity to testify to her that it really isn't gross but something really beautiful, it is a bonding experience.  I remember when my mom told me about the birds and the bees.  I was actually really young because the school was going to be offering a sex education and my mom wasn't ok with it.  I remember my first impression was also gross.  But after you get married, and having the gospel teachings, it makes you realize how close we are to our Heavenly Father when we bring children into the world.
     Within our marriage, we have to have good ground rules, so that we can avoid any awkward situations.  This is so important.  If we have them set up early in our marriage then we can protect ourselves later.  An article titled Infidelity: Protecting Our Marriages by Scott Gardner and Christian Greiner put forth some great guidelines to put in place.  They are:

•  Resist the desire to rescue an unhappy soul who pours their heart out to you.
• Don't share the most painful things of your soul with an attractive alternative that develops deep levels of intimacy.
• If a conversation makes light of marriage, respond with something positive about your own marriage.
• Discuss marital issues with your spouse.  Work on the problems at home.  If you need to talk to someone else about your marriage, be sure they are a friend of the marriage.
• Don't have lunch or take breaks with same person all the time.
•   When you travel with a co-worker, meet in the public rooms, not in a room with a bed.
• If an old boyfriend or girlfriend is going to be at a class reunion, make sure you bring your spouse along.
• If you value your marriage, don't do lunch alone with an old flame.
• Don't try to be cute or "flirty" with anyone other than your spouse.
• Do not allow your heart to dwell on anyone.

     My husband has had several experiences at work, when he female co-workers have asked him to carpool, or come to their house to work instead of the office.  Even though this put my husband in awkward situations, he was able to tell them that he and I had made a promise to never be alone with the opposite gender.  His boss when she was told this was impressed.  She told him that there needed to be more people like that in the world.
     Another example is 2 summers ago.  I was pregnant and still went to girls camp.  The camp director, at the end of camp, was trying to make sure that all the girls were on the buses before we all left.  There was 4 of us in a Suburban heading home, the Camp director, her husband, the assistant camp director and I.  The assistant had already gone to the bus loading zone.  But the camp director still wanted to check things out. 
She told me to just ride with her husband to the bus loading zone and she would meet us there.  I kept trying to tell her that I didn't want to do that.  She didn't understand why I wouldn't go.  She was just trying to be nice since I was 6 months pregnant.  So I finally whispered in her ear that I didn't want to be alone with her husband, and that I would rather walk down with her to the bus loading area.  This surprised her a little but luckily finally agreed.
     In this same article, it says, "A temple marriage does not guarantee a celestial marriage, or even a pleasant one.  No matter who we are , where we are married, how much we love each other, or what calling we have, we must always be on guard against affairs."  This is so true.  My grandparents got divorced after 45 years of marriage.  I think my Grandpa thought just because he didn't have kids at home that it would be less people affected.  This wasn't true.  It affected everyone, his kids and grandchildren.  This was a huge lesson for me that even if you've been married for 45 years you still have to work at your marriage.  I have a sign on my wall in my bedroom.  It says, "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."  We may have our ups and downs in our marriage but it necessary to work every day at falling in love with our spouse.
     Back to setting guidelines for your marriage, I heard a story in Young Womens.  It is called the The Ambulance Down in the Valley.  It says:

The Ambulance Down in the Valley
Joseph Malins (1895)

'Twas a dangerous cliff, as they freely confessed,
Though to walk near its crest was so pleasant;
But over its terrible edge there had slipped
A duke and full many a peasant.
So the people said something would have to be done,
But their projects did not at all tally;
Some said, "Put a fence 'round the edge of the cliff,"
Some, "An ambulance down in the valley."

But the cry for the ambulance carried the day,
For it spread through the neighboring city;
A fence may be useful or not, it is true,
But each heart became full of pity
For those who slipped over the dangerous cliff;
And the dwellers in highway and alley
Gave pounds and gave pence, not to put up a fence,
But an ambulance down in the valley.

"For the cliff is all right, if you're careful," they said,
"And, if folks even slip and are dropping,
It isn't the slipping that hurts them so much
As the shock down below when they're stopping."
So day after day, as these mishaps occurred,
Quick forth would those rescuers sally
To pick up the victims who fell off the cliff,
With their ambulance down in the valley.

Then an old sage remarked: "It's a marvel to me
That people give far more attention
To repairing results than to stopping the cause,
When they'd much better aim at prevention.
Let us stop at its source all this mischief," cried he,
"Come, neighbors and friends, let us rally;
If the cliff we will fence, we might almost dispense
With the ambulance down in the valley."

"Oh he's a fanatic," the others rejoined,
"Dispense with the ambulance? Never!
He'd dispense with all charities, too, if he could;
No! No! We'll support them forever.
Aren't we picking up folks just as fast as they fall?
And shall this man dictate to us? Shall he?
Why should people of sense stop to put up a fence,
While the ambulance works in the valley?"

But the sensible few, who are practical too,
Will not bear with such nonsense much longer;
They believe that prevention is better than cure,
And their party will soon be the stronger.
Encourage them then, with your purse, voice, and pen,
And while other philanthropists dally,
They will scorn all pretense, and put up a stout fence
On the cliff that hangs over the valley.

Better guide well the young than reclaim them when old,
For the voice of true wisdom is calling.
"To rescue the fallen is good, but 'tis best
To prevent other people from falling."
Better close up the source of temptation and crime
Than deliver from dungeon or galley;
Better put a strong fence 'round the top of the cliff
Than an ambulance down in the valley.

This story is perfect.  We need to have the fence at the top of the cliff (and not got near the edge) than to have the ambulance down at the bottom.  We need to have these guidelines around our marriage so that we aren't walking on the edge.  One of my favorite quotes from the movie Fireproof is (A Christian movie about strengthening marriage)

 "You never leave your partner, especially during the fire."  

Marriage is the most holy thing.  We get to come together as husband and wife, create children, and progress together towards eternity.  The adversary will do all he can to interrupt those plans.  We have to be strong.  We have to work daily on our marriage.  We need to be near our Savior and look to him for help and strength.